minimads | Mum In The Madhouse

minimads

Polarn O. Pyret in action

As you can see from above, they have worn them on numerous occasions and they are brilliant. We received some colourful denims in blue, which both the boys have worn. They have an adjustable waist and look great rolled up on Mini or full length on Maxi. Mini is seen wearing a block stripe top , what I like about this is it washes and dries really well without pulling out of shape and it made from the softest cotton. Maxi is seen in the PO.P stripe top, which is currently in the sale at £11. This is made from organic cotton and Maxi loves it. It has become his go to top. He has issues with sensitivity and this top does not itch, scratch or rub in any way. We were so impressed with the clothes that I have even ordered some more in the mid season sale, which just shows that the boys love them.

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Imperfect Parenting in an Imperfect World

I used to think I was a crap mum. I used to feel that my family would be better off without me. I do not say these things for people to counter with “no you aren’t” or “no you weren’t”. The fact is that I really did feel this way and I truly thought that MadDad and the boys would be better off without me. I suffered with Post Natal Depression, I bullied myself, catastrophised everything and was filled with terrible anxiety. I couldn’t separate rational and irrational thoughts. I received fantastic treatment including cognitive behavioral therapy over five years ago now and it changed the person that I was and helped make me the mum and person I am now .

I was reading Kate’s post earlier in the week about how scared parenting made her feel and it brought all those feelings back to me, but rather than let them take over me, I remembered that I am parenting in an imperfect world and my imperfect parenting skills are just preparing y boys for the road which they will travel. This is one of the biggest things that CBT gave me, it helped be put things into perspective and process them. I am not a perfect mum, but I am the best mum the boys could hope for, I am their mum and I love them with all my heart and every fibre of my being.

I have two quotes that help me navigate the waters of perfection, for as soon as I realised that I didn’t need to be the perfect mother, that it was OK to give shop bought food and not beat myself up about formula feeding and ensured that if I was happy so would the boys be, things started to come together for us all.

“There is no one way to be the perfect Mother, but there are millions of ways to be a good one!” – Jill Churchill

“Being Happy doesn’t mean everything’s perfect, It means that you have decided to look beyond the imperfections” – Gerard Way

So on those days when I am screaming like a fishwife at my boys or wondering how to find the words to tell them about challenges that life may through at them, I hope that I can remember that it is OK to be an imperfect parent in an imperfect world and give myself a break, for this parenting lark is the hardest, unceasing, but most rewarding job I have ever done or will ever do.

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Everyday Echo’s

They all tell you the same cliches:

You won’t know that you did with yourself before they came along

There is nothing quite like being a mother

You will have so much respect for your mother once you are one

They grow up so fast

We heard them all and so many more, but we didn’t listen. We had waiting many a long year to have a child. We both longed for children, but had convinced ourselves and each other that we were fine as a couple and that we couldn’t keep on trying and failing at being parents. Then one day we had a little boy and then 15 months later another new born. Those first years past by in a blur of nappies, exhaustion, feeding and joy, inescapable joy. I can not put into words how lucky we are to have two amazing, unique and challenging children.

Those children that each night before bed we both go and watch sleep, just as we did from the first day we brought each of them home. It is part of our nighttime routine. MadDad goes to one door and I the other, then we pass on the landing as we swap. Then we move on to our room safe that we have breathed in a special piece of our family to infuse our sleep with. I like to use the excuse that I want to make sure they are tucked in and their lights are off and books off the best, but in truth I want to just watch them and breathe in their smell.

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Capturing Family Moments with Panasonic

Take a look at the very short edited video and let me know what you think of the quality. I was really impressed at the footage taken in the reading room at The British Museum as the light was really poor and photographs without flash did not turn out, whereas the video camera took perfect pictures. The camera retails at £240 on Amazon and I really wish that Panasonic had given me one rather than just loaned it to me! So if you are reading this Clara, it got lost in the post, OK!

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When lines cross

Sunday came and Mini apologised to all the parents for his behavior but this wasn’t enough for this parent who has stated that he is pulling his son from the team. This has been such a terrible experience for all of us. We have come very close to pulling both boys from their teams and moving them to another club. MadDad’s enthusiasm for the game has been shattered and we have all felt emotionally bruised by this judgement in to our parenting.

It was the first week back at school and Mini was tired. He is six years old, he had a tantrum. I am not trying to make excuses for Mini, but these things happen and nobody should be making judgement on our life without walking a mile in our shoes. The fact that this parent is so offended by his behaviour now makes me wonder just who has the issue here. I do hope that his son still plays as all the children seem to have a fab time and love playing.

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Raising Olympians #RaisinganOlympian

But then it came to me. Both my boys are very academic and sporty and excel in these areas. However, Maxi is a pretty sensitive young man and although he is more than happy to get up and speak in front of an audience, he finds dressing up and expressing himself challenging. This year he was asked if he would like to be part of a drama group and even though it was way out of his comfort zone, he accepted and did an hour after school every week leading up to a show this week.

Both MadDad and My sister in law took the time off to come and see the show we me. We didn’t know a lot about it as Maxi had kept us in the dark, all we know was it was Joseph and His Technicolor Dream-coat and that he had a solo in it. What can I say, my boy astounded me and left his Daddy speechless. He was amazing., He stepped out of his comfort zone and put his whole heart in to his performance. He smiled through the play. He sang with gusto and his solo brought a tear to my eye. But the best thing about it was that he enjoyed the whole experiance.

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Encouraging and nurturing writing in Boys

o this summer we will be doing the following:

Sending postcards – my boys love receiving mail and postcards are a great starting point to encouraging writing. They do not need a lot of completing and are great fun to collect, write, stamp and post.

Keeping a scrapbook – We are going to keep a book and include in it all the things we do over the summer. Keep receipts, ticket stubs, print out photographs and add personal notes to it

Make our own note paper – I thing that by making our own notepaper of letterhead then I can encourage the boys to do paper work whilst I am.

Write our own Newspaper – Everyday is filled with news, but looking at what has happened over the day we can p

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The things they say and do – Singing out of tune and girlfriends at 5

Whilst they were playing, Miss Frugal (who is the eldest of the bunch) taught the boys kiss, dare, truth or swear, which led to much hilarity in the car when Mini was picked truth and told me he had a girlfriend, but he had to share her with his friend at school too and that they took turns on which days they could kiss her on the cheek!

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