Monthly Archives: June 2011

I think I must be living in a parallel universe! 41

 in blogging  tagged bloggers / Blogging / cybermummy 2011 / mummy bloggers by

I attended Cybermummy (a mummy blogging conference) this weekend, which was billed as The UK’s premier Blogging Conference and I have to say that I really did wonder if I had taken a wrong turn and turned up somewhere else!

I have put off writing this post for a few days to see if my opinions changed after some time to assess and disseminate the things that had been going through my mind, but they haven’t and I have to say I was really underwhelmed with the event.

I thought the venue was not particularly suited, one session room was inaccessible if you had a buggy and yes this is marketed as an event for mummy bloggers. Some poor soul got locked in the loo and it would have been nice to have a map and maybe even agenda’s on the wall somewhere.
Don’t get me started on t

Five 16

 in minimad  tagged Birthday / five / Mini / MiniMad / minimads by

ow to describe Mini, well he is noise with muck on.
His emotions run close to the surface and some times get the better of him, but this means you always know where you stand.
He is a lover and a fighter.
He shows a talent for music and a passion for reading and literature.
He is my earth, wind, stars and moon.

Bittersweet 45

 in family  tagged bad day / death / feelings / hospital / life / mortaility / mum / mum death / parenting by

I have been trying to keep myself busy these last few weeks. Trying to avoid the feeling that has been building in my chest, the rising emptiness that has permeated my whole being. I dare not stop, I dare not let this feeling invade for the tears will start to fall and I fear that they may never stop.

Perspective, yes that is what I have needed. It is hard to admit that I am still grieving, that I am scared and that I am so frightened at the moment. That living my life can be so bloody hard. That sometimes the fear paralyses me, that I want to curl up in a little ball and not to go on.

The tooth fairy made her first trip 13

 in maximad  tagged maximad / tooth fairy by

I asked about on twitter to find out what the going rate was and settled on £1 per tooth. Maxi went to bed and popped his tooth in to a small lavender heart with a pillow on that I had made out of an old baby blanket and just couldn’t get to sleep due to the whole excitement of the tooth fairy. We kept on telling him that the tooth fairy only comes when you are asleep, so finally after what seemed like an age, but was only 20 minutes he was sound a sleep.

I made sure we had £1 and when we went to

Dad 11

 in dad  tagged dad / father / fatherhood / my dad / poem by

I don’t need to write down how much of a fab dad MadDad is to the boys, as they experience it everyday. They are so lucky to have such a fantastic male roll model in their lives, instead I am going to tell you a little about my Dad.

My Dad

Does the passing of time without someone in your life make them them become larger than life? I often wonder if I look back on my time with Dad with rose tinted glasses, but then I realise that no, this was just the man he was.

My Dad was a mans, man. He was an engineer and worked in the ship yards, He was a strong man with wide fingers and muck permanently under his nails. The lines in his hands highlighted by the oil and grime put there from years of hard graft.

Overstretched, underpaid and giving it their all 29

 in hospital  tagged dad / hospital / Mastectomy / maximad / MiniMad / NHS by

have never made my admiration for the NHS a secret. I am one of the few who has seen them when a real emergency occurs. Who have seen them give their all when people where in life or death situations and watched as they provided amazing acute health care. Whats more this health care, which in other countries would costs tens of thousand of pounds is free.

nearly 12 years ago my wonderful dad was involved in an industrial accident, He was resuscitated at the scene by his work mates and the first responder (a paramedic in a car) and then blue lighted to hospital in an ambulance. Upon arrive to the A&E department he was provided with top notch trauma care, including x-rays, scans, pain relief, breathing assistance and medication. When my mum arrived at the hospital she was ushered in to the trauma department and keep pretty much informed and updated as the situation would allow.

Tracks of my years, the Karaoke edition 6

 in Tracks of my years  tagged eels / music / tracks of my years by

I was tagged by Carol at Dance without sleeping to show you my karaoke edition.  Now the thing is I don’t have a karaoke song.  I have never sang a song in public and am not sure I am going to start now! Not only would I burst a few ear drums (even the boys ask me to stop singing in the car), but I would be far to embarrassed, as I am very very shy.  Yes, I know that is hard to believe but it is true. However, I do sing at home where no one can hear me apart from the stray cats who often join in my wailing. more »

The Family Home 12

 in family  tagged death / home / house / the family home by

It isn’t uncommon these days for people to move in and out of houses and to buy, sell, relocate and leave home. So it is pretty unusual that we have a family home.

So let me tell you the wonderful story behind 132.

When my Dad was a young lad he was an apprentice at British Shipbuilders and was sent on secondment to Shell, at their Milford Haven site in Wales. Back then my Grandad and Grandma lived in a council house and my dad would travel on his motorbike to Wales every Monday Morning and come back one weekend a month, but he always sent his wages home to his Mum for her to put in his account.

One month he returned home, only to find out that he didn’t live there anymore! Yes it seems that my Grandad and Grandma had moved whilst he was away and he hadn’t received their letter in time. So the people who had moved in to the council house gave him the address of the new house that his parents were living in.

Is it OK to be broken? 38

 in bad days  tagged bad times / depression / illness / uncertianly by

ometimes I have to sit back and tell myself it is OK to be broken, that after all I have been through and am going through, that it is acceptable to have a rant and a pity party every now and then.

I have days, well mostly nights, when the world seems to weigh down so hard on my shoulders. When it seems pretty impossible to put one foot in front of the other, let alone work on identifying my negative thoughts and trying to change them. So sometimes, I cry, sometimes, I sit at the computer and pour out my soul for everyone to read. But in doing this I wonder if I am doing the right thing. If I should be making all my feelings public for people to see. For my boys to come and read in the years to come.